Practical tips from a practicing divorce coach.
Written and shared with Guyvorce.
How To Avoid Escalating Arguments With Your Ex
Read my most recent article published by Guyvorce!
Overcoming Anger At Your Ex!
You are getting a divorce. Perhaps congratulations are in order, or, perhaps not. Whatever your sentiment about the separation and divorce, make no mistake about one single thing: how you behave now and throughout the divorce with your spouse will define much of your life post divorce. And no, it isn’t just for the kids this is true although that is very important. It’s your mindset and focus that matters, right now, even as you likely face huge life change and emotional overwhelm.
When couples are in the midst of the divorce process, they have a lot on their minds. They are typically just trying to get through each day one step at a time. Often, the absolute last thing they want to face is their financial picture and what changes are taking place as a result of the dissolution of the marriage.
We, at Dear Divorce Coach, have coined the term “toxhole” to refer to an ex who is both toxic and an a**hole too. Although it’s a funny term, dealing with one is anything but laughable. There’s the ex who dumps you unreasonably or maybe doesn’t even give you the satisfaction of saying goodbye. Some exes treat you terribly in a relationship. Worse than both of those exes, however, are those, unhappy in your relationship but unhappier after the split. If you don’t have children with them, it’s easy to put as much distance between you and them as humanly possible and not be exposed to their negative fuming. But, what if you do have kids and are required to co-parent with them, or rather, with a toxhole, attempt to do so? There are no easy answers but there are some coping and communication strategies you can use to make your life more manageable. After all, you deserve to have a life after your relationship even if it appears their single-minded purpose is to ensure otherwise. Try these strategies and let us know your story and what we can do to help. We have tools to make life better, for you and your children.
You got dumped. You need help surviving and thriving afterwards. We have a plan for you! Read our tips here!
4 Ways To Survive A Breakup When You're Still In Love With Him
Often, I hear from clients, during separation and divorce, that they are lonely.
Loneliness, as most of us know, comes from a feeling that we are missing something or that we are disconnected. In separation and divorce, or even when trying to repair a broken relationship, this feeling might arise. However, if we keep digging, we might discover that loneliness is simply what we are feeling most of the time and only discover it when others aren’t around to distract us from it. Another person didn’t actually cause the loneliness, they didn’t fix it but rather simply distracted us from it for some period of time. What, then, is loneliness, really?
Divorce and money always seem to be intertwined and certainly not in a good way. Kind of like the chicken and the egg. Did money problems cause the divorce or did the divorce cause money problems? Usually, the answer to both questions is YES!
For many people, marriage involves financial stress…and lots of it. Money always seems to be tight for one reason or another. Perhaps one person is a spender and the other a saver. Or perhaps financial secrets were being kept. Or, maybe, as the couple grew older, their financial values shifted away from one another. No matter what occurs, there may be some financial disconnect between the couple that is unresolved and ultimately, among other factors, led to the separation.
Your mindset matters for you and your children! Find out why trying to ruin your spouse in divorce is a big mistake! Dear Divorce Coach’s Cherie Morris provided Your Tango with their expert advice!
3 Reasons Trying To 'Ruin' Your Spouse In Divorce Is A HUGE Mistake
Certified Divorce Coach, Parent Coordinator, Lawyer, Yoga Teacher, Divorced Parent